Sunday, January 20, 2019

Of RV Life

Telling people that you're living in an RV...with five kids...while homeschooling...is almost as much fun as telling people that your husband is deploying...and you're pregnant again...with twins. I keep getting the "You should write a book about that!" line from people who forget that I have five kids and am not naturally self motivated. Basically, if I don't have at least three kids whining at me for breakfast, why would I even get out of bed in the mornings? And at what point are they going to stop whining for yogurt and start whining at me to go write?

But the five kids in an RV thing is actually going really well. There's just something about going outside to dump the coffee grounds out of my French press and seeing the smooth, silver grey back of a dolphin slipping through the water in front of me, reappearing and disappearing while I hold my breath.
Littles making use of our really expensive whiteboard

Marine life aside, the lack of cleaning time from living here is the real selling point for me. If I need to vacuum, I vacuum. There's no need to put it off until I have a thirty minute window. It takes literally five minutes and the whole "house" is done. Sometimes I even get Twinkle to do it. One year olds think vacuums are amazing. I think any time a one year old is occupied with anything that is productive instead of destructive is amazing. I don't have endless bathrooms to clean up. I don't have endless shelves to dust. I don't have endless dishes to wash. We wash them immediately or we use a paper towel. It doesn't pile up because there's no where to pile up.

I've moved the picture frame since I took this picture,
but look at how clean that counter is.

Our washing machine has been a source of endless pleasure for me. Having a washing machine in the RV was kind of a deal breaker for me because I do a lot of laundry. This one keeps me motivated to stay up with laundry because it takes forever to churn out a load, and if you leave the laundry in the dryer for more than three seconds after it finishes, the wrinkles set in. You have to pull out the clean clothes while they are still steaming, risk burning your hands off permanently, and do a quick shake and fold or resign yourself to looking like you've returned to the 90s and the days of crinkle broom skirts. Bonus for our washing machine, when it's running, it gently shakes the whole RV so that you can pretend you are on a boat, floating somewhere warm and beautiful where your children can climb coconut trees that haven't been snapped in half like matchsticks and you can eat fresh pineapple while blatantly abandoning all plans to homeschool.

Photo courtesy of Littles. Wobbly table putting in an appearance on the right.

I did tell the kids though that I won't miss these wobbly RV tables. We have a long U shaped couch with two small tables that can be packed away when not in use. They are always in use for us because our family has ongoing school work and insatiable appetites. They are useful (the tables, but also occasionally the kids) but they would never be termed as sturdy. Friday, in the middle of school, Tiny's Wordly Wise book got a nice coffee bath when he accidentally bumped the underside of the table with his knee and sent my coffee sloshing all over the table. Unluckily for Tiny, his book was still completely legible and he then had to be taught by a mother who was missing out on half a cup of coffee.

One of our main concerns with moving into the RV was where to put the pet's stuff. We found a spot for the dog bed and bowls immediately under the fire place. The dog water only gets splashed on the floor a couple times a day, so I'm taking it as a win. The cats get fed in the kitchen sink. As soon as they're done, we have to wipe down the entire kitchen because Blythe insists on eating with her paws and flinging wet cat food to the heavens, but at least it encourages me to wipe things down more regularly. Anything that forces me to clean more regularly is a positive. Similarly, the litter box has been placed underneath the girl's bed, the only place it wouldn't get stepped on, which motivates me to scoop waste 2 to 3 times a day in order to make sure the bunk house doesn't smell like moldy cat pee.

Don't be fooled.
RV life isn't always this idyllic.

All these silver linings. I really enjoy getting to pretend to be a good house keeper for once. I'm never letting the Man move us back into a regular house. Except for the tables. That keep spilling my coffee. And possibly the lack of bookshelf space.

But for the duration of our time here, I will put our library to good use, never set down my coffee mug while the kids are up and about, and revel in my upgraded house keeping skills. Luckily for my lack of bookshelf space, the Books-a-Million is still closed. And there are dolphins to keep me distracted from Amazon Prime which could very quickly ship whole boxes of paperbacks straight to our RV. Although now that I think of it, my chocolate drawer is almost empty so I could probably put five to six books in there...

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